Being a parent, especially a dad, is tough. Having to compound that with a son/daughter playing competitive sports and the combination becomes brutal and that line of being an objective yet supportive parent gets as fine as Beyonce at Coachella. No one will evaluate your kid like you… NO ONE! No matter what, your kid is never as bad as people say and he’s always better than what people think- IN YOUR EYES.
As a father of 3 children, I totally understand it! I live it everyday. As a parent we always have visions of grandeur for our kids, and our evaluation of him/her will always seem the most accurate, but unless you work for a reputable media or scouting service or you are a college basketball coach, your opinion doesn’t matter! Let me take that back. You’re opinion does matter.. to YOU and maybe your child. But in the grand scheme of things, it’s not as important as you think.
You have the right to be your child’s biggest fan, cheerleader, & personal battery pack, just don’t be DISRESPECTFUL. You CAN’T go on social media and bash media members, coaches, scouting services, etc. You CAN’T just say what you want on social media or even in public, unless your son is a sure fire, top 10 player in the country, or a lottery pick.. and even then it’s still a little taboo. News flash.. nobody wants to deal with parents who can’t seem to help hang themselves on social media. Not HS coaches, not summer coaches, not members of the media, and especially not college coaches who get paid six & seven figure salaries. It’s tough enough on a player trying to make it in a game where everyone thinks they can and should play. The negative effects of you, as a parent, going too far will harm your kid way more than you think. What happens then is you now put your kid under a microscope. Everything he or she does, good or bad, is now magnified times ten! Now, they’ll never get the benefit of doubt. Example, your kid may have just played a pretty good game, but because their parent(s) always have something to say, or often feels “he is the best kid out here”, to the media or coaches evaluating him, he was just “Ok” that night. You’ll hear, “The way his parents pump him up, he should have had a way bigger game”.. That’s coming straight from the people who are evaluating your kid for the next level.
Here’s some things to help parents who feel their child is getting “slept on” or slighted.. First, get a VALUABLE second opinion, don’t ask your spouse, or your neighbor, or your best friend, or your kid’s HS teammates dad. Get a reliable, respectable person who knows the game of basketball, knows what it takes at the next level, has seen other prospects, & has helped other players get to the next level. Have that person evaluate your kid, with an objective eye. Another thing you can do is “don’t press send”. You may want to vent about how the coach doesn’t know what he’s doing.. or how the members of the media “hate on your kid” which leads to another point… NO ONE HATES YOUR KID… If you want to say that the kid on the “shoe team” isn’t as good your son, whatever it may be, just type it in your notes section of your phone. As sure as I’m writing this, you should also know that there have been several college coaches who have personally told me that they wouldn’t recruit a kid because of the parent, especially a kid who isn’t in the top 100, & even those parents can’t get too far out of line. The last and most important thing a parent can do is be a supportive, loving parent. Cheer your kid on, push him when they need to be pushed, get them the training they need, and then enjoy the process. I know how this article may come off, but if you let your kid do the talking with his play on the court, no one will be able to deny their success.